


Due Twilight

by ButterflyGhost



Series: Comedies, crossovers, and other weird anomalies. [1]
Category: Twilight, due South
Genre: AU, Due South - Freeform, Other, Parody, Werewolf, twilight - Freeform, vampire
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-11
Updated: 2012-03-11
Packaged: 2017-11-01 19:18:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/360321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ButterflyGhost/pseuds/ButterflyGhost
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The 27th precinct makes some rather unusual arrests, and what happens afterwards...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Due Twilight

This had to be the weirdest arrest of his entire career. Ray Vecchio stared at the guy in the holding cell, and scratched his head. The kid was... well... glowing.

“What are you, Tinkerbell?”

“No.” The perp was pacing the cell. “I'm a vampire, and if you don't put some curtains up I'm going to turn to stone.”

“Right...”

“Seriously, what am I under arrest for?”

“Being a... what did you say... a 'vampire' isn't enough?”

“You can't arrest someone for what they are. That's just prejudice. I've done nothing wrong. You should let me go.”

“I'm afraid he's right Ray,” Fraser's voice came from behind him, causing his friend to jump. This vampire stuff must be getting to him. “We can't arrest someone just because of his ethnicity or species.”

“Him and some other loony were beating the snot out of each other when we picked them up. Besides, the guy must be guilty of something. His family alone... I'm telling you Benny, the kid's mobbed up.”

“Will you put a curtain across that window! I'm going to turn to stone.”

“Excuse us.” Fraser smiled, and drew the curtain. “Is that better?”

“Yes, thank you.” The young man smiled, then sniffed. “You smell good,” he said. “Not as good as Bella, but still...”

“Oh great,” Ray raised his eyes to heaven at the inevitable. “Now he's got emo teenagers after him.”

“I don't think this gentleman is a teenager,” Fraser said. 

“And I don't think he's a vampire,” Ray turned and stamped out. “He's all yours Benny, see if you can get any sense out of him.  
…

Elaine was sitting in Welsh's office, keeping an eye on the girl, Bella. Apparently she'd lost it when she heard her boyfriends had been arrested, and hit a police officer. Right now she was chatting with Elaine, seeming perfectly normal, waiting for a social worker to turn up. Seeing Vecchio, Elaine gestured at Bella to remain seated, and poked her head through the door. With a serious expression on her face she whispered to him, “we've got a bad case of child abuse here. The girl's family has let her read some really dreadful teen romance books... seems to have completely messed with her emotional development...”  
...

The other kid they'd brought in was currently in the interview room, cuffed hands and feet to a chair. Huey and Louis were staring at him through the glass.

“Hey, guys... don't you think that's a bit harsh?” Ray was surprised by the four point restraint. “Why aren't you questioning him?”

“You question him,” Louis swallowed, with an audible gulp. Ray shrugged, and stepped into the room. 

A few minutes later he was out, rather nervous, and beginning to reassess his opinion on this case's connections to the supernatural. “Call animal control,” he said, simply. 

Yeah, this was a really weird day.  
…

Silence fell as Fraser stepped into the bullpen. He was looking pale, and somewhat tense.

“So? What have we got?” Welsh had been apprised of the situation, and had finally stopped shouting and calling them all manner of names when he had been introduced to the werewolf.

“Well, we've got charges against him...” Fraser was running his finger along the inside of his collar, wincing slightly. “Not sure how it would go down with a jury though.”

“What charges?”  
…

Yeah, this wasn't going to sit well with the district attorney, Ray decided. 

Edward Cullen, vampire, arrested for affray and charged with cradle snatching.

Jacob Black, werewolf, arrested for affray, taken off by animal control, escaped and at large.

Bella Swan, arrested for assaulting a police officer, additionally charged with outrageous flirting and embarrassingly girly behaviour. 

At least Fraser was taking it in his stride. The two men fell into step beside each other as they left the precinct. 

“It's been a long day, Benny,” Ray sighed. “Do you fancy stopping off somewhere for a bite?”

“Yes, thank you kindly Ray,” Fraser licked his lower lip. “That's a very good idea...”

**Author's Note:**

> Don't take this too seriously! I just wanted an excuse to be silly.
> 
> If I've trampled all over your fandom, whether it's dS or Twilight, please forgive me, I was just having fun.


End file.
